Category Archives: White Soul
Some white people can sing too.
Drake- Ism, “Take Care”- Ism
Aubrey Drake Graham exists as both an actor & rapper singer.
Mr. Graham needs to be very careful he doesn’t fall into “Ja Rule” territory, which he is hurdling towards with his latest effort, Take Care.
The “lonely-kind-of-singer-kind-of-rapper-entertainer-sitting-by-a-golden-bird-whilst-being-Jay-Z’s-unshaven-look-circa-6-months-ago” look is not really doing much for…anything outside of 1983.
I never bought the “Drake is a gangster because he chose to sign hang out with Young Money” image,
AND NEITHER SHOULD YOU
Care is in the title of his sophomore effort. HOW HARD IS THIS EXPECTED TO BE
Drake happens to be a walking dichotomy. Smart enough for the nerds/backpackers, [Insert 6 letter word, adj. here] ish enough for…everyone else.
Initially, I thought of writing a review upon first listen. Deciding that would have been premature & possibly unfair (although I have a very good sense for identifying hit songs, quality songs & plain sh*t) I marinated. I’ve lived with this Take Care album for a week now, it’s time I shared the in-depth breakdown.
1. Over My Dead Body- Boring. In one instance I fell asleep. So it doubles as a lullaby.
2. Shot For Me-
3. Headlines –
4. Crew Love Feat. The Weekend- 1st good song we come across. Best of all, The Weekend does the singing here. Also, The Weekend may or may not sound like The Dream. Perhaps it’s their affinity for articles.
5. Take Care Feat. Rihanna- Just…waterboard me. This will be a sickening crossover hit– everyone loves Drake, everyone loves Rihanna. Put them over a fart (which this song makes me want to do) and it will be a smash. Call it the Jay-Z effect.
6. Marvin’s Room- Spawned too many spawns this summer. We’ve all drunk dialed. We’ve all been 2am mad. Drizzy accurately captures this while caressing his own scruffy chin.
7. Buried Alive (Interlude) Feat. Kendrick Lamar- Kendrick Lamar is getting much of the same type of buzz Drake was 2 years ago (as he likes to remind us). Drizzy gets kind of morbid not only on this track -but the whole album- which is weird. What is he talking about? Why is he so upset at his success? ISN’T THIS WHAT YOU WANTED
8. Underground Kings- Love this. Particularly it’s ’90s rap sound. These types of records are why we love Drake in the first place. Well done, Noah ”40″ Shebib & T-Minus. Sometimes I need that romance, sometimes I need to pole dance.
9. We’ll Be Fine (Feat. Birdman)- Would’ve been fine sans Birdman.
10. Make Me Proud (Feat. Nicki Minaj)- This duet does little to quell my feelings they’ll both be donned in pink for the vid. Admittedly, I like it–this too (is currently) a big record.
11. Lord Knows Feat. Rick Ross- Here is the standalone “street cred” song on Take Care. Personally, not crazy about it. However, production by Just Blaze & Rawse’s sheep will propel this– at least on late night radio.
12. Cameras Feat. Jon B./Good Ones Go (Interlude)- Easily my favorite track. Impressed is an understatement when it comes to how I feel about him even knowing Jon B.’s Calling On You. Lends to the theory of Drake-ism. Can’t be a gangster listening to Pleasures You Like. Original:
This, ladies and gentlemen, is partially how underrated artists get their due– rediscovery. So, not so bad after all. Jon is an amazing artist, one of my absolute favorites. Click here for the interview I did with Jon B. this summer.
The interlude is a killer.
13. Doing It Wrong (Feat. Stevie Wonder)- What was that? Would you like some more WHINE with that cheese? BUT OF COURSE. THIS TRACK’S ONLY SAVING GRACE IS STEVIE WONDER’S HARMONICA
14. The Real Her (Feat. Andre 3000 and Lil’ Wayne)- Aside from the fact you can barely differentiate Wayne’s voice from Drake’s, it’s pretty cool. Andre 3000 always elevates anything he’s on. #SEEWHATIDIDTHERE #ELEVATORS
15. Look What You’ve Done- Best song on the album. About his mother, uncle & grandmother. Well done.
16. HYFR Feat. Lil Wayne- “Hell Yeah, F*cking Right” should not follow Look What You’ve Done. What is the connection here? Again, lost in the Drayne voice matrix. And it sucks.
17. Practice- We’ve heard this before, circa 12 years ago. With a few more gold teeth, and Mweaves (Man weaves) sprinkled in between.
Practice raises a different question. WHERE’S MANNIE FRESH
18. The Ride Feat. The Weekend- Meh.
Bonuses
Hate Sleeping Alone- Not deplorable. Could’ve replaced one of the 1st 3 songs. Or all of them.
The Motto Feat. Lil’ Wayne & Tyga- The only dance-able cut was relegated to an afterthought. Why is this a bonus & that atrocity HYFR gets to have an album cut? WHO MADE THIS DECISION
Miscellaneous Notes:
- Noticeably, his voice (not style) sounds a lot like Lil’ Wayne. Doesn’t help half of this album consists of his rhymes too.
- He didn’t “Baaaaaaawwww” that much this go around, which is kind of disappointing.
- WHO ARE THESE GIRLS HE KEEPS MESSING WITH
Now that you have been saturated with more references to “OVO” & “XO” than you care to count, do yourself a favor.
Love,
*Ms. Officer
Ms. Officer and The Jon B. Interview
It’s been a while since I’ve published anything here, and with good reason. I wanted my 1st post back to be special, and something you requested.
On a June afternoon, I hurry down to Herbert Von King Park to ensure I’m on time for my interview with Jon B. Hurry may or may not be an understatement, the blocks in Bed-Stuy have not yet all been gentrified. This is that section.
Jon headlined the show, with Olivia as his opener as part of the Summerstage concert series. Why they picked this venue is beyond me. Was Vanderveer Park overbooked?
Although I’d previously met Jon B. at his album release party for Helpless Romantic, I’d never actually seen him perform. He is an amazing talent who hasn’t had the greatest promotion behind him over the years. However– his fan base is extremely loyal.
Anyone who has ever been to Von King knows it’s recreation center resembles the 2nd floor of a Public School.
If you manage to not be distracted by:
- the Negro yelling in the background,
- my humidity fried hair
-the seizure my camera friend appears to be having
- the setting
…this shaped up to be a very good interview.
@ :14 Talks about intimidation from Ryan Leslie
@ :54 Future collaborations
@ 1:45 Working w/ 2Pac, Nas, Jay-Z, & other Hip-Hop Legends
@ 2:14 “Lame White People Who Don’t Understand”
@ 3:27 Getting credit for Robin Thicke & Justin Timberlake’s careers
@ 4:36 “Are you financially well off?”
@ 5:10 Comfortable Swagg album release date: 11/11/11
@ 6:10 Rumors of Jon & LeToya Luckett
And then he gives me a drop for MsOfficer.com…which you see me ask for.
Thanks to his Jon’s wife Danette for being so gracious, manager Jamal & Slam from YKIGS.
Here’s his new one with DJ Quik, “Real Women”. PREACH.
More to come, more to come.
Love,
*Ms. Officer
Top 5-ish, Maybe 10 Songs Of The Week, 1/31
It’s been a while since this feature has made an appearance.
Now it’s back.
Due in part to the fact that I’ve been receiving a lot of music submissions lately. E-mail me @ (do people still spell that with the dash anymore?)
MsOfficerBlog@gmail.com if you’d to be thrown up. Beware you are subject to brutal honesty…but hey, we’re just all trying to be better.
**Disclaimer: All tracks are for promotional use only. You’ve seen what happened to OnSmah & Limewire. I am not hardly going out like that.**
10. Avant- What’s Your Call (Prod. by Darkchild)
This is here solely based on it’s nature. @ Approximately 1:00, sorors feel free to “OOO-OOP!”
Avant’s Iota Phi Theta shout is barely audible– he stuck it on the fade out of the song…
9. Jay Sean Feat. Lil’ Wayne- Hit The Lights (Tags)
“And it goes on and on & onnnn, and it goes on & on & onnnn”
Though it bares a striking resemblance to Taio Cruz’s Dynamite, this Indian-y guy has somehow made this more tolerable.
8. David Guetta Feat. Willy William- Sexy Bitch (Remix)
DL/Listen Here (Courtesy Music Zone 514)
Any reincarnation of this song is alright with me. Perhaps the added bonus is Akon’s nasal-y voice has nothing to do with it.
7. LLoyd Banks Feat. Jeremih- I Don’t Deserve You
The way that Negro Jeremih spells his name is annoying. He also resembles a young, fatless 50 Cent. Despite all of those distractions, good song.
6. Wiz Khalifa- We Drift Deeper
So there is more to him than Black & Guido & Kanye’s leftovers.
Sounds a little Memph Bleek-ish.
5. Fresh Jacobs- Seize The Time
I would be remiss if I were selfish in keeping this to myself. I also love hearing tracks where I don’t regret the sample clearing. My only gripe is that it isn’t a few minutes longer.
4. Eminem Feat. Vybz Kartel- W.T.P. (Remix)
He looks f*cking retarded.
So does he.
The skin bleaching has yet to reach Kartel’s brain because this song still is tough.
3. Chris Brown- Beautiful People (Prod. by Benny Benassi)
We all know how I feel about CB since…Rihannagate….
A little bit of rehab, a sprinkle of community service, and a dash of udst-udst udst…&
Oh sh*t we’ve got a hit.
2. The Game Feat. Busta Rhymes- The Ocean
They like each other’s jewelry. They show that in pictures.
The wizard Dr. Dre is back at it again. Look at how he flipped the Baltimore Riddim:
Does he know I can see the beach when I listen to this? Was that his intent??
I knew Dr. Dre wanted mind control.
1. Dr. Dre Feat. Eminem & Skylar Grey- I Need A Doctor
Em’s passion is ridiculous. If you don’t feel this, it’s waaaay too late for a Doctor to help you.
*Bonus*
Sterling Simms- Digitz (Prod. by Stereotypes)
DJ Skee & The Game- Purp & Patron
Within hours of it’s release, the damn thing was trending on Twitter. Even Dave Chappelle likes it:
Worth it? It’s an album presenting itself in mixtape form. Besides, I can’t blame this Patron craving on anyone else.
Whew. That should hold you over for a while.
Love,
*Ms. Officer
The. Best. Christ. Mas. Songs. Evar.
December.
To me some it represents the impending doom of Jury Duty, only obeyed for fear of sharing a cell with an enlarged “woman” named Tiny. To the world over, it signifies the thick of the Holiday Season, and, most importantly– the fun “month illustration” on every calendar.
A feeling only Chrismahaunakwanzikah can bring.
This season is also particularly special because it’s the only one with it’s own soundtrack. Sure there are songs about love, but not necesarily Valentine’s Day, No one outside of the Irish sing for drinking, St. Patty’s Day, and I’ve never particularly heard a President’s Day song that made me want to blast it on my iPod, further deafening myself.
However:
5. Nat King Cole- The Christmas Song
Mr. Cole’s voice is akin to a fireplace and a freshly iced gingerbread house. That you just bit the door off of. Because you thought no one would notice if you called it a gingerbread “hut”.
For now, let’s just call him the Velvet Voice.
4. Paul Mc Cartney- Wonderful Christmastime
As cheesy and heavily synthed as it is, it gets radio-played almost 10 times an hour. This is obviously some sort of scientific measure of Paul McCartney’s popularity. I can listen to this sequence (or lack thereof) and not get exhausted. Maybe that says more about me than it does the song.
3. Stevie Wonder- Christmastime
On an ordinary day, during any one of his songs, Stevie Wonder’s voice makes my eyeballs well up. Add pine, memories of holidays past. Here is the recipie for the salty discharge that begins to roll down my cheeks. We’ve got a stage two tissue emergency.
Please don’t take Stevie Wonder at all. Take Soulja Boy instead.
2. Mariah Carey- All I Want For Christmas
The crowd pretty much echoes the world’s sentiment on this song. If you don’t agree, you’ve never:
a.) Truly appreciated Mariah Carey’s crazy
b.) Truly appreciated Mariah Carey’s genius
Much like last week’s toenail standing moment at The Garden, this and the following have been in contention for the number 1 spot.
1. Let It Snow- Boyz II Men Feat. Brian McKnight
If you can get passed the abusive hoop-earring wearing in this video, you can truly appreciate the song for what it is. Nostalgia & Christmas Cheer donned in Charlie Brown sweaters.
A classic with a twist . And I wouldn’t have it any other way.
*Bonus*
It’s ok, half my family is Jewish. I’m allowed.
New Vid: Jon B.- Body Language
Funny enough, I heard this song earlier today for the 1st time on my own reconnaissance.
And just happened upon the video:
@ :10 This is obviously not part of the video. Don’t need it.
@ :22 Is he drunk?
@ :27 “This is the flyest sh*t I’ve ever been a part of”
@ :37 I don’t like it when people do “cat things”
@ 1:06 Is this not in HD?
@ 1:21 He’s obviously into doing that Bobby-Brown-I-Talk-Out-Of-The-Side-Of-My-Mouth thingy
@ 1:30 That’s pretty hot. I want to do that.
@ 1:42 I’d get the piano
@ 1:55 That’s quite the scarf
@ 2:04 Very Prince-ish
@ 2:37 Every White man (no matter how Black or Puerto Rican-y) owns a “Newsies” hat.
@ 2:40 I want to be played like that.
@2:44 Him being outside during the day has everything and nothing to do with the rest of this video.
@ 3:05 Cannonball!
@ 3:18 Don’t get too busy spinning around, there’s a moving ass right by your face– oh– you caught it
@ 3:25 She’s fat
@ 3:35 There’s a lot of sh*t floating around in that pool. But I’d try that.
@ 3:59 He’s not afraid to like what he likes. I like that.
Overall, this is a cool vid. A little different than the usual, the instruments add a nice touch. What’s with the Asian Chicks? I ran into Jon B. earlier in the summer at another group’s album release. Love Jon B.’s music.
Love,
*Ms. Officer
Hilarity Pt. 25- Rude Boy
White people can’t dance.
As if all other scientific studies haven’t justified this, here’s yet another video proving it true.
I’m pretty sure this was not the intended use of Rihanna’s Rude Boy.
Love,
*Ms. Officer
Why Sumner Redstone Is A Hot Piece of Ass
This is Sumner Redstone:
(I’m-almost-dead Hot)
Now to the undead naked eye, he may not look like much. But to a hopeful blushing bride me, he’s fine as hell.
And worth $2.8 billion.
The media magnate is part of a sultry list of the Forbes 400.
Other sex kittens wealthy beyond human brain comprehension include:
Samuel Newhouse: Jew-y Hot
(Conde Nast/Discovery) $6.2 Billion
Charles Ergen: I-sell-a-bunch-of-sh*t-that-doesn’t-really-work Hot
(Dish Network) $5.2 Billion
David Geffen: Skinned-cat bald Hot
(Music/Film) $5.1 Billion
Haim Saban: Mosque Hot
(Power Rangers) $3.4 Billion
George Lucas: I-have-a-Black-wife Hot
(Star Wars) $3.25 Billion
Oprah Winfrey: Why-aren’t-you-married-yet-who-is-Gail-really Hot
(Media) $2.7 Billion
Mark Cuban: Straight-jacket Hot
(Let it be known, I’d actually date him)
(HDNET/Dallas Maveriks/Entourage Cast Member Now) $2.5B
Ted Turner: Mustache Hot
(TV/Communications) $1.9 Billion
Michael Ilitch: I’ve-never-seen-a-f*cking-Little Caesars-ever-so-they-don’t-exist Hot
(Little Caesars Pizza) $1.7B
I know what you’re thinking:
1. She’s sick (you have no f*cking sense of humor if that’s the case)
2. “Why have the hots for a peasant such as Redstone? Why not go for the gusto with Bill Gates ($54B)?”
Because I like a little humility with my coffee, thank you. The richest man in America? That’s just tacky. Besides, Melinda doesn’t seem like she’s going anywhere.
They may be all raisins -with the exception of Mark Zuckerberg (Facebook, 26, $6.9B) & Oprah- but if you say you wouldn’t “top off” any one of these Forbes 400 for, like, morthgage, or a Gallardo, you’re a f*cking liar.
{Disclaimer: I just want to get rid of this f*cking Northeastern debt now, without having to die or be near dead to do so}
Anne Cox Chambers: She’s 90 Hot
(Cox Enterprises) 12.7 Billion
This is all in jest. I’m just playing.
Love,
*Ms. Officer
Where The Hell Did Time Go Wednesdays- Blink 182
Craving the innocence packaged in the ’90′s I see every morning in reruns of “Saved By The Bell”,
this was more than appropriate.
11 years since this came out and it still makes you giggle like you’ve seen it for the first time.
Who doesn’t enjoy the vid that singlehandedly encompassed all tawdry, obnoxious Pop stereotypes of the decade and rolled them into one?
This obviously means that quality+catchy song x lots of MTV TRL airplay= awkward White boy acceptance.
I like that equation.
Love,
*Ms. Officer
It’s Over
Now, ordinarily when listening to John Legend, I feel like I’m listening to
See? (& I hate that song)
But!
Someone’s not afraid to ‘Rock The Mic’ (wink, wink)
& to prove it, John Legend’s new song w/ Kanye West is completely off the hook. I can’t stop listening to it.
Sucky quality, I know, but you get the idea.
Say what you want about him, but he’s ill. I’m team Kanye.
![[KANYE_WEST_ANIM.gif]](http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_fUAw_Eigics/Rp-b-r6pd9I/AAAAAAAAAFo/SgjGbPginoQ/s1600/KANYE_WEST_ANIM.gif)
Thanks man.
I love this one too
& A ¡Bonus! for ur listening pleasure:
The original soulful white boy everyone thought was Puerto Rican then mad when they found out he was Italian then embraced him anyway, Jon B. (Accompanied by a Mr. Paul Wall on the track).
Who cares, that song is hot & Jon B. knows how to make a good record:
Whooaaa
& Don’t forget
aaaaaoooowww (that also goes quite nicely with Koffee Brown’s After Party if ur DJ’ing)
ah, white soul.
Love,
*Ms. Officer
