Monthly Archives: November 2009
Yikes
I make my rounds on newspaper websites daily, you know– the ones that count:
The New York Times
The Daily News
USA Today
&
S*hit That’s Usually Hearsay But Is Printed Up In Newspaper Form The New York Post.
I was reading the latter & became completely alarmed when I came across one story in particular:
This dude who was adopted named (or so he thought) Matthew Roberts just found out that Charles Manson is his pops.
CHARLES MANSON IS THIS MAN’S FATHER
There is no other feeling than horrific to know that you have the blood of one of the most gruesome & famous criminals in history coursing through your veins.
Well, here’s the backlog: Matthew is a 41 year old disc jockey out of California whom is a self-proclaimed “peace loving, free spirited vegetarian”. He became curious about his birth parents, and a search through a social services agency led him to his birth mother, Terry.
Terry fessed up and not only told him that his name was really Lawrence Alexander Manson, but that he was a product of a night when Charles raped her as a result of a drug-induced orgy.
Wow.
But here’s the kicker:
Mathhew Lawrence Matthew
wrote to Manson in jail. In return, Matthew received a series of rambling letters from Mason, not only confirming he was the father, but revealing weird details about he & Terry’s relationship.
When asked about the discovery, Roberts said, quote:
“It was like finding out your father is Hitler.”
Yikes.
Love,
*Ms. Officer
Female Viagra
Now that I have your attention, there is a story behind this. Apparently the folks over in Germany (the country responsible for bringing us The Grafenberg Spot–otherwise known as “The G-Spot” via ’90′s Foxy & Jay) can’t seem to find their way around this female sex thing.
Apparently this is so puzzling that they’ve come up with a pill that will help ladies achieve climax. Brought to us by German drug maker Boeringher Ingelheim, Flibanserin promises to drive the feminine libido by lowering the very thing that has c*ck-blocked many-a-night for fellas worldwide:
Inhibition.
Isn’t that why we get mind-bendingly drunk
on the weekends
after work
Every time we don’t have to do something stupid like care for children or operate large machinery?
Well, instead of having an effect on the G-Spot itself, Flibanserin’s magic works on the brain, causing the mind to relax more. originally intended to be a anti-depressant, it quickly changed gears once clinical trials on over 5,000 dried up women showed reports of increased sexual appetite.
Guys may still want to save that extra condom: The FDA has yet to approve Flibanserin, with it taking anywhere from 6-18 months in order to get that done. Not to mention no one’s sure of the pill’s side effects or dependency issues.
Damn. So you could get hooked on this?
Don’t wanna end up like this chick:
(Kari Ann Peniche)
She’s lookin RECKLESS
Love,
*Ms. Officer
Janet Jackson- Make Me
Check out the latest from one of my absolute favorites ever, Janet Jackson!
She looks absolutely beautiful!
Allow me to excuse myself while I pull something trying to mimic this dance.
Love,
*Ms. Officer
Johnny Depp the Sexiest Man Alive??
Well it took long enough, but here I am! And it only took one simple magazine cover to prompt me to do so.
Johnny Depp the sexiest man alive???
This list is actually revered by many. It’s usually pretty accurate as to who they select, and the cover usually tends to be the best choice.
Buuuut
Are they f*ckin insane?
There is nothing sexy about
Johnny Gill
Johnny Damon
Johnny Depp.
When I look at Johnny Depp, I do not want to have sex.
In fact, he seems abit molestor-y.
Not just here.
and certainly here:
It seems to me that he really wouldn’t be interested in anybody over the age of consent.
Yep, That’s about right.
Love,
Ms. Officer
